This book is designed to help women move away from styles of managing anger that do not work for them in the long run and begin to use anger to clarify a new position in significant relationships. Chapter 1 begins with an explanation of how women have been discouraged from the awareness and forthright expression of anger, the dichotomy between the nice lady and the bitchy woman, and strategies for developing and sharpening anger management skills. Chapter 2 addresses ineffective blaming versus assertive claiming, balancing separation and togetherness, and dealing with reactions of individuals who want you to change back to old patterns. Following chapters discuss patterns couples fall into that are ineffective, anger at our impossible mothers and breaking family patterns, using anger as a guide to a clearer self, communicating effectively across generations, assigning responsibility, and stepping out of family triangles. The final chapter suggests tasks to help women understand old circular dance patterns and develop an ability to move differently in relationships. 37 references.