Couples Benefit from Stress Early in Marriage
Newlyweds, take note: There just might be a silver lining in the next stressor coming your way.
UT researcher Lisa Neff has found that couples who face stressful events early in marriage are happier with their relationships later on.
Neff and her team at the Austin Marriage Project, an interdisciplinary lab in UT’s Department of Human Development and Family Sciences, studied 61 newlywed couples using surveys and videotaped interactions. Among those couples with better communication skills to start with, some reported moderate stress—such as moving or changing jobs—in the first six months of their marriages, and some did not. Over the next two years, the spouses who dealt with stress early on reported higher levels of marital satisfaction than those who did not face prior stress.
This finding flies in the face of the prevailing wisdom of Dr. Phil and Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. These pop-culture icons—as well as many researchers and clinicians—argue that good communication skills are the key to a healthy marriage. While those skills are still an important foundation, they can only help so much, Neff says.
